Alone

Will I be here forever.

Sitting alone in a bar wishing you were here, that anyone was here.

Will it be this way forever

Wondering why, what happened in my past that put me here

Will i be here forever

Looking around to see if im not alone in being alone

Is this all there is, is this all i have?

Will it be this way forever.

Sitting alone, looking around with hopefull eyes,

Wondering when she will walk in, take me out of this bad dream, the fantasy realized 

Will I be here forever

Paying for companionship, tipping for looks

Developing relationships based on nothing but bullshit.

Will it be this way forever

Will i always be here, sitting in a stool reserved, this spit of solitude

Having a drink and wondering why, is this a normal life, longing for connection but barely willing to try

Will I be here forever

Staring but trying not to be seen

Unable to talk about the weather, coming across as rude, sometimes even obscene

This personality feels like a prison

Always wanting but feeling inadequate for having

Will it be this way forever

Will she ever walk in, take me to a different scene.

Wash away this sin, look me in the eye and tell me everything is meant to be

Will i be here forever

Paying the toll, trying to make up for what ive lost but not realizing im just digging a fucking  hole

Will it be this way forever

Will I someday feel at peace

Will i learn how to love myself and stop looking for external relief

Will I be here forever

Stuck in my bullshit, just empty fucking grief.

Will it be this way forever

Oh Poor fucked up me