Alone

Will I be here forever.

Sitting alone in a bar wishing you were here, that anyone was here.

Will it be this way forever

Wondering why, what happened in my past that put me here

Will i be here forever

Looking around to see if im not alone in being alone

Is this all there is, is this all i have?

Will it be this way forever.

Sitting alone, looking around with hopefull eyes,

Wondering when she will walk in, take me out of this bad dream and realize the fantasy.

Will I be here forever

Paying for companionship, tipping for looks

Developing relationships based on nothing but bullshit.

Will it be this way forever

Will i always be here, sitting in a stool reserved for a spot in solitude

Having a drink and wondering why, is this a normal life, longing for connection but barely willing to try

Will I be here forever

Staring but trying not to be seen

Unable to talk about the weather, coming across as rude, sometimes even obscene

This personality feels like a prison

Always wanting but feeling inadequate for having

Will it be this way forever

Will she ever walk in, take me to a different scene.

Wash away this sin, look me in the eye and tell me everything is meant to be

Will i be here forever

Paying the toll, trying to make up for what ive lost but not realizing im just digging a fucking  hole

Will it be this way forever

Will I someday feel at peace

Will i learn how to love myself and stop looking for external relief

Will I be here forever

Stuck in my bullshit, just empty fucking grief.

Will it be this way forever

Oh boo hoo poor fucking me